Random Family rumblings...second month adoption reflection

A natural cheerleader! 

We had a fun bowling outing with our small group and friends! 

First trip to the zoo! You loved it.  The Gibbons were really putting on a show and you loved all their funny noises.  You had so much fun on the big playground with your brothers. You think you can do everything they can.

Fun at the zoo!

Silly kids

This girl .loves to get eggs! 

Classic!

Farm Finger Painting in the mud.

Little J is getting really opinionated about his clothes...ugghhh...so now I am hoping to say each weekend, "you pick 3 and I pick 2" so that he can wear all his clothes instead of just a few.

Cay and I are setting a lot of traps in the woods these days for animals.

Little Miss is really noticeably better at some physical things like two-feet jumping, running over rough terrain without falling, and climbing up fences, walls, and banks with great gusto!  She has also learned to master the forward flip!

YES, they called us with a girl but she is a rough and tumble little two-year-old tomboy!  Really, she is a wild woman with lots of personality but a really strong will.  I am so tired.   She is a lot of fun, but she is also testing us at every turn to see what we are going to allow.  She is just more into things than any of my kids EVER were.  She's like a little tornado!  She loves to do all the things the boys do, play with balls, wrestle, run, chase chickens,  jump on the trampoline, drive the Powerwheels (and she is an amazingly good driver to have very little to no experience), play outdoors, etc., and she has really just fit here likes she's always been here! 

We are going to remain close to her foster family (elderly folks with 7 kids and 3 adopted ones)...they are such godly people.  We took them dinner last Sat and visited with them and had a great time. She was so excited to have both worlds there and left happily with us.    2 of their kids came to see her and so we got to meet some of their extended family who have loved her so well these past two years.

I am hoping to raise a very strong girl. I think I have just the candidate in this little one b/c she rises to every challenge so far!

This is supposed to be for dolls?! 

 We took Little Miss back to where she lived starting her 2nd month with us and we had a wonderful visit with their family and extended family who came to see her! They are such inspiring people and we are so blessed to be in their world these days.

Some folks keep asking how nervous I am about all this "working out" and I just keep saying that I trusted God with her for 2 years and I will keep trusting HIS best for her life. I have my palms open saying still I trust you God...use me...whatever that means for us.

Little Miss you never forget a name.  You can see someone that you have not seen in a long time and still call him/her by name...maybe you'll be a little politician.  You do love people.  You are totally energized by having people visiting us and going out and seeing folks.  You often say hi to strangers and give them high fives.

You reminded us how fun Red Rover and Ring ARound the Rosie can be!

I never eat a full plate of food anymore without your little hands grabbing bites.  You are such a good eater...of all things..broccoli, edamame, peas, and anything you can spoon!

Little Miss loves some Vanilla Ice Baby!  First of all, I don't know how I discovered this love one morning or WHY I remember every word from seventh grade--so sad.  Still, she loves my rapping.

We are learning "this is not a toy."   She wants to play with all things non-toy like pens/pencils, toilet bowl cleaners, kitchen stuff, etc.

We got all the paperwork for her court date today.  Thank you Lord we are on the month countdown to the termination of parental rights hearing.
  This is the song I am singing...


Thomas Chisholm is  the author of the hymn "Living for Jesus," and I like this one...(in case you didn't know I really love hymns despite that I can't play the piano..or sing...only pray them...)


"He leads us on by paths we did not know;
Upward He leads us, though our steps be slow,
Though oft we faint and falter on the way,
Though storms and darkness oft obscure the day;
Yet when the clouds are gone,
We know He leads us on.
"He leads us on through all the unquiet years;
Past all our dreamland hopes, and doubts and fears,
He guides our steps, through all the tangled maze
Of losses, sorrows, and o'erclouded days;
We know His will is done;
And still He leads us on."

Sweet things I noticed lately:  She asks me in exact words to sing "Jesus Loves Me."  She loves to make up songs (that sound like parts of other songs all mixed together) and sings back to me!
If  I say I like purple, she adds, "I like purple too Mommy!"  If I want a red Popsicle she'll say, " I like red too!"  My boys really never had this stage.

When we were going to church the other morning I was relaying the events to get her ready, "We are going to play with Pam and then Mommy will pick you up and then we'll get Cay."  She adds, "and then Daddy will come home and go to pool."  (She has been asking to go to the pool often b/c I think it is another new world there she wants to conquer.)  Anyway, she then added, "Daddy come home ...I KISS him." She loves to rush Daddy when he gets home and they trade many kisses. He says she's the only welcoming committee he's ever had...yes, I know I should do better.

She loves to sing Jesus Loves Me, Skinny Ma-Rink, and I've got the JOY, joy, joy..where????

The funny thing about taking kids to get eggs is that you find 8 but make it home with 4.

Little Miss you are not much of a girlie girl, but you love nail polish, chap-stick, bracelets and you even let me read all of Pinkalicious to you today!

You rode Jack and the pony for the first time!  You, of course, were not afraid and got on and said, "yee haw!"

Some people have a lot of reservations about adopting "older" children (those not considered newborns or over a year old), but I can tell you that there are some beautiful things about it!  For starters, she can talk and tell us what she wants and what she likes AND dislikes!!  We can explain changes in schedules and dropping off at places like church and she "gets it."  She might not like it, but she gets it.  She can express love and affection and say funny things!  She is already potty-training!  We can play with her and interact and bond by having fun together.  We can teach her lots of fun things and take her most anywhere with us.  It has really been a blessing that she can run along with us and jump right in with the boys!

My Adoption Diary: Month one thoughts...

My adoption dairy.  Month One! 

Our first hike! 

Happy Girl!

Little Miss and her new cousin are only 8 days apart!

first time helping Daddy bring in wood

 I wanted to go back and post these now that our waiting time is over and "Little Miss"  is legally ours forever.  I hope that something in one of these posts might help someone else consider going on the faith journey of adoption!  My prayer for years was that our adoption using the public social services system (that gets a very bad rap) might go smoothly and wonderfully so that many others would take the plunge to choose a child out of the system.  It did, so here I can testify to God's faithfulness and say without hesitation that adopting from "the system" is not always a nightmare. 

These are some of my thoughts on our first month together with sister--

Little Miss let Jeb rock her last night and it was sweet, sweet time with me there cuddling next to them on the floor and watching big brother learn how to be a daddy one day.

I can't believe that she has slept through the night every night here.  I am forever grateful to my child's first parents who loved her, nurtured her, and were attune to her every need (as evidenced in a mountain of paper work I have).  Her first parents were/are simply amazing people that really challenge me to be a better parent myself.   I KNOW they did a good job b/c she can attach so well and so quickly to us and to her new grandparents and family members.  She takes on new tasks (like sleeping in a strange bed) with great gusto like swimming at the pool, jumping on the trampoline, chasing chickens, petting goats, and going on hikes in backpacks.  She has very little fear, which is somewhat her nature I can tell, but also her great upbringing thus far.

Little Miss is saying, "I love you" spontaneously without us saying it first and ALWAYS after we say it (it was not like this a month ago).

Little Miss is POTTY-TRAINED!  I hope no-regression is in store!  I don't know why, but I think potty-training is one of my gifts-ha!

Little Miss knows many animals that she didn't know, all her animal sounds, and is learning some odd body parts like elbows and shoulders these days.  She is starting on colors and shapes...so far we know Blue for Blues Clues and pink b/c most everything for girls is PINK! Where is the purple folks?  That is my fav color and what could be wrong with red for girls....there is just a bit too much pink for me and I always thought I liked pink?

We did have a day with 10 time -outs, but hey, who's counting?  She is what every little toddler is...testing us to see if we will let her take over or if we are going to be in charge!  I am continually reminded to do more teaching than real discipline at this point.  I feel like I am a full-time teacher ..we don't throw things in the toilet, we don't throw things down the stairs, we don't throw things at other people, we don't unroll whole rolls of paper/boxes of tissues, we don't tear books, we give hugs, we don't throw things down the dryer vent, we don't hit, we don't pinch, we don't yell and demand (so happy that she now says cups please vs. MY CUP MY CUP MY CUP while screaming), we sit in a car seat and not scream, we are gentle with animals, as you can see there is some teaching going on!  Still, amazingly, we have had no biting and no hitting of parents?!!!  Hooray!

Not much is sweeter than when my boys flock to her when she wakes up...and seeing her warm up to this idea rather than shy from it.

Specially Marked

I have three birthmarks and my mom always said I must be extra, extra special since my two siblings don’t have a single one!  This helped me be less self-conscious of the spots, and I never thought much of them my entire life until recently.  Twelve years ago my husband and I were just dating when I told him that God had convicted me that part of His plan for my life was to foster parent and/or adopt.  After a decade of marriage we began the process of waiting for “the call.” After the first year of waiting, I did some serious praying and then near the second year mark, I began to wonder if this was really what God wanted for our family. After all, I could have another baby or finance a private adoption.  We had been praying for the protection of our future child, and for discernment to know when to say yes.  God never let go of me on my core belief that in the state system there are many children that just need a chance and lots of love in a healthy family.  Over the years, God sent my husband and I and our boys many adopted children and orphans that we have loved and enjoyed building relationships with before and during our wait that gave us much encouragement and compassion for adoption. I was really wondering if there was a child “in the system” that could fit our family’s parameters though.  During the second year, God worked on us about accepting more risks than we originally thought and about taking a child that was older. I am so glad he did.  We also brought the boys in on praying for a child to love that needs a family during our family devotions that second year.    About one month before my two year deadline I had given God (Yes, I am ashamed of myself…but oh so human and weak that he loved me enough to respond to my desperation.), I had a good cry with our small group and asked them to pray.  Then, only two days later THE call came.  Our life group must have really prayed!  She was a two and a half year old that had been in foster care her entire life.  She had been in a loving Christian foster home with folks we now love and adore!   We said, “Yes!”  Only a few weeks after that meeting, she was in our home and relishing every new opportunity on our farm.  The answer to our prayers was praying with us and FOR us.  It was incredible!  She seemed destined for two brothers.  I already felt so much confirmation of our decision to love her forever since her transition to our family was really quite natural for us all.  But, God was not done with teaching me that he’d had things under control.  Only about two weeks after her adoption day, I was snuggling with her after nap when I noticed it.  Two of my birthmarks are small spots just above each knee.    As it turns out, she now has one above her left knee in the exact location of mine.  I don’t know when it came up, but I had never seen it before.  I cannot help but think that God was clearly telling me that though she was not my biological child that even before she was formed set her apart (Jeremiah 1:5).  He had marked her special just for me, and I knew her frame was not hidden from Him (Psalm 139).  Great is His faithfulness!

 

The Ladies of Spring

Dumbo....those ears are just too much!

 I don't worry much about J having affairs with other ladies, but he does love these girls. 

One of the cow J loves that came from out West.

Pretty Lady

While we were adopting Molly (the same week) this Mama lost her baby, but that has not stopped her from allowing another woman's calf to nurse.  This calf actually has 2 mamas.

Daisy-my favorite cow.

Dumbo with Gertie, her mom.

Our latest addition.

Love that bullseye

If there was plastic surgery for hefers, I am SURE that she would want these horns removed.  They just don't do anything for her.

I call her Mocha Frap

Lovin' and Lickin'

Nothing like a milk nose.  This little fella was not born too long ago, but he is growing like crazy.  No wonder!

This guy is just pitiful.  Skunky, we call him.