Our small group is still working on learning how to discipline our kids better. These are some thoughts I compiled from the two books I've read on the subject...
I know for many they don't believe in spanking at all...but I believe it can be used effectively and lovingly with good results...I use it sparingly, but when I do it works...
Proverbs 22:15: Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline will drive it far from him.
Proverbs 13:24: He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.
Proverbs 13:24 The Message: A refusal to correct, is a refusal to love; so love your children by disciplining them.
Psalm 119:2: Happy are those who keep HIS rules, who try to obey HIM with their whole hearts.
Using the Rod for Direct Disobedience and Defiance:
Taken from, “Don’t Make Me Count to Three” by G. Plowman
1. Discuss what the child has done wrong and why it is your responsibility to spank him/her.
Probing Questions: Was God pleased with what you did/said? What was wrong with what you did? What should you have done? I must spank because I love you too much to allow you to disobey. I will not let sin take root in your heart and grow.
2. Guide the child in thinking through what he/she could have done differently.
3. Use the proper instrument as your spanker—preferable not your hand.
4. Let the child no how many swats he/she is going to receive. This lets your child know that you are not out of control and are not angry and vengeful.
5. Do it promptly after the misbehavior and discussion, but not in front of others.
6. Take time for reconciliation and hugging immediately afterward. Give your complete forgiveness. Jesus did not take time to “cool off.” He does not turn from us when we mess up…he draws us to him to reconcile. We have no right to withhold forgiveness, after all we’ve been forgiven often. Colossians 3:13 Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
7. Require the child to make it right. Have him/her apologize to whomever he/she offended. Give back the toy, share the treat, practice saying things the right way and then MOVE ON! The slate is completely CLEAN!
Obedience should be all the way, right away and
with a happy heart!
Recently, Jeb and I were with Mrs. Betty, a sweet dear lady that goes to the Chinese Christian Church and loves the Lord. We were talking about all of this and Jeb said to her, "My Daddy spanks good." When I spank he ask, "Is it going to be a hard one?" I suppose that means that most of mine are not hard enough. When we first started spanking Jonas used to practice on me (really he did come hit me with the paint stick a few times before he went to Jeb and I told him when it stung!)...I guess he got it right with all that practicing.
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