10 years and it all falls apart! ha! Secret blog...Finding A Good Man

You know you still are crazy about your man when Sunday night comes and you are sad that he has to go back to work for the week.  10 years and I still LOVE being with him.

I'm glad the marriage is going strong at 10 years b/c not much else is making it!

I just went to a wedding shower and I had totally forgotten how fluffy washcloths and towels were!

In between the towels becoming burlap and the blender having buttons that you have to guess what is what b/c the words are all faded away we have lost our TV, our mattress was a taco, and our walls needed a seriously new coat of paint this summer.  Not to mention, that our furniture is ratty from the throw up and dirty shoes.  Things I can't tackle now, but I need to are the carpet is way past its prime, and our lawn mower is barely making it.  While we were in the doldrums over small and large items disintegrating on us J added in that he just had to have a new chainsaw before winter. I don't know much about chainsaws so I wonder if he was just pulling the wool over my eyes, but I fell for it in the landslide of things that were dying I thought it might be true.  So, now that we have a new chain saw we also decided to take down all the dead trees that were dying due to goats eating them and lightening striking them this year.  See, even trees have gone kaput this year.   I don't know what the 20 year mark is going to be like, but the 10th year has been rough on us financially.  It is like I need another wedding shower at the decade mark!

Then, the last straw was the coffee maker, even the coffee maker, the simplest of appliances just up and died on us the other day.

So, to mark 10 years I thought I would shed some light on how to find a good man, in my opinion, based on how happy I have been with my choice.   

(This is the secret part.  If he knew I wrote this I would be forced to take it down because he doesn't want me bragging on him.)

I know that some women marry for money. To each his own. Most any man has the ability (with the right amount of “gumption” as we say in the South –either for education, hard work, or family money as seed money for a risk-taking adventure) can get rich.  However, I suggest that women look for a man who has some other characteristics that might come in handy more often in REAL life.

Proud Papa!

Always has time to wrestle with nephews...this is why my family calls him "the bonus."

 For example…

He does not bring home work or a grouchy attitude  from work.  

When a woman says, “I left my bag in the car.”  A good man like mine will say (he does usually anyway)…do you want me to get it? Or I’ll get it later or sometimes he’ll even go and get it.

When I pull in from work late at night with groceries/loads of paper he doesn’t sit there or wave at me, he gets up and comes to help me unload the car.

He is not too proud to drive a mini-van because that is the most pragmatic vehicle for this season of our life!

He is unselfish with his time. 

Although he has plenty of stuff to do on his own to-do list, he takes time to spend quality time with me, which is my love language.  

Although he’d rather fish alone, he spends a lot of time untangling our fishing wire and getting it out of trees.

Although he’d rather hunt during hunting season he still won’t miss small group or a soccer game.

Even though he’d like to come home and “unwind” like some men in the Lazy Boy instead he heads to the playroom to find us and engage with his kids!

He cuts the grass even when he thinks it doesn’t need cutting…but someone else does.

He will drive a mower with the mowing deck tied on, it barely moving, and belts breaking every other time he mows until we have the money to buy a better one. 

He looks all over town for some home improvement thing I want, even if he really doesn’t agree with my “want.”  

He's a good teacher too!

He is not too close-minded to talk to  just about anybody about anything.  

He will read anything you ask him to…even if he’d rather be reading something he likes…because in the end he might like it or at least we can talk about it b/c I thought it was great!

He will sit in the car happily while I “run-in” places, which actually might take a lot longer than I thought.

When I come home with our children, he comes to the car to help us get all our things and people inside.

He will drive a mower with the mowing deck tied off, it barely moving, and belts breaking every other time he mows until we have the money to buy a better one.

He never complains about the food made.

He will stay home for me to go out with friends without whining or complaining but instead treasuring the time to make memories with the boys. 

He has finally been trained to take the trash without being asked-usually.

He spends hours on Google trying to figure out how to fix all sorts of things so that we don’t have to pay someone else to do it.  He has literally saved us thousands of dollars figuring out how to fix cars, trucks, house issues, etc. 

He will drive junky cars so that I can be home with the kids during the day.

He prays EVERY night for our kids' future spouses.

He prays EVERY night with the kids.


He teachers them all about the Bible and...how to deal with bullies.  I have to come and stop the talking at bedtime...but I am so thankful for all the communicating going on with 3 men. 


He still kisses me goodnight EVERY night before bed.

He still lavishes affection on me and the kids.  He is generous with compliments.  


He doesn't make a big deal out of stuff that is just NOT a big deal. 

I had to just take a moment in my married life history and say...Yeah! I got it right!  Whew...